[NO FLIGHT DELAYS] The Staycation

Since when does going on vacation mean you actually have to go somewhere? Here at Tripenator we are pondering actually taking vacation which consists of going nowhere. We are trying to weigh the pluses and minuses of taking one or more weeks off and not going to a destination of any sort.

Since we all like weekends and think they all end to damn early why not bridge the gap to the next weekend or even the one after that with a vacation. Without even thinking about this for very long it actually sounds like it has has lots of upside.

There are some considerations which should be taken to maximize your Staycation’s potential. Clearly you should only attempt this if you actually like living where you currently reside. However a case can be made for people who hate where they live if their vacation alternative is to Disney or on a cruise, where the vacation itself would be many many times worse than not even being on vacation. People trying this should probably live alone and if you do it should not with a significant other that will try to make you do chores.

A tripenator study showed that late spring / summer would be the optimal time for a Staycation. Self conscious people should avoid a Staycation so they won’t feel bad that others will think they are newly unemployed. A pool or other outdoor venue nearby to lounge at (the beach is now considered a Tripenator approved daytime destination for Staycation as long as the drive there is under 15 mins). Tripenator understands that most people are outside while on vacation and Tripenator hates people that hang out inside more than 30% of daylight hours if the sun is shining. Doing active things (Golf / running / stretching / volleyball is ok. Living within walking distance of many restaurants is also advised. As people on vacation rarely cook for themselves. Going on Staycation with a few friends would be a good idea.

> The Pluses: Well first of all it’s cheap. You don’t have to shell out the big bucks for a plane ticket / rental car / lame activities/ souvenirs etc / magazines to read while on the plane.

Travel time is zero so you can start doing whatever the hell you want.

Restful - Since you’re probably a lazy bastard for wanting to go nowhere on vacation you’re cool with doing very little. How many times have you come back from a “restful vacation” completely rested?? ZERO i tell you. The truth is only 1% of actual tourists actually enjoy some R&R while on vacation. So This is the perfect opportunity to get R&R.

Looking like an unemployed person. Most tourists booze it up during their entire vacations. So what’s the problem if you act like you’re in Rome when you are in your apartment? Why do your neighbors think you’re out of a job when you’re half naked stumbling over to the pool holding a cooler in one hand and a bloody mary in the other at 9:30 am on a Tuesday? It’s because they are losers they have to go to work and definitely jealous of that killer tan you’re gonna wind up with. If you keep it up for several nights. Its great basically being carefree for a week. Going to a midday matinee alone is another indication you are unemployed or even better – skipping work to catch a flick which is a nice touch to up your street cred with the movie staff.

Living like a rich guy for a week. Yeah you didn’t want to pay for the plane ticket and all the rest of the bs. But if you’re the savvy type you saved up so you can splurge. You can definitely go out and eat out at the Longhorn every night just like people do when they are in Florida and you can splurge on the filet and Lobster combo and order four margaritas (you typically get one when ur not on vacation).

Wear whatever you want - you definitely dont have to dress to impress. you dont have the annoying girlfriend that feels the need to dress up whenever you go out to eat making it painfully obvious that you are a tourists. If you are a douchebag that wears Aloha shirts on vacation you can still rock it if you like but there is a 82% chance people dont realize you are actually on vacation which is much better.

> Minuses: There does not seem to be a whole lot of downside to the Staycation. Obviously if you live somewhere sucky you made a bad choice.

For the single guys that are trying to impress girls- they might think you are an unemployed loser so they might steer clear of you and your midday boozing ways. There is a fairly good chance these same ladies are also unemployed but this doesnt matter as they are probably gold diggers seeking out the richest men around.

The Local bars suck midweek – since you dont live in a vacation spot nobody goes out like they do in vacation spots . So there is a high probability you could be out at a bar with very few people. If you are on Staycation alone you might be going to bars alone which totally sucks unless you can convince friends who arent on staycation to join you.

Staycation is actually too good. You will realize this was probably your best vacation you ever had and going back to work is nearly impossible. Going back to your house might make you feel like you are on vacation but then BAM reality hits and you are really not on vacation.